I thought Sex was Everything - when By Itself, it was Nothing

It has taken me most of my life (I am now 80) to realize this.

I got this misunderstanding (you will not be surprised to learn) from my family, who was not that different from most of the families in the Midwest, in the middle of the last century. Sex for them, was suppressed - which only made it more powerful. It poisoned relationships, that should have been normal - such as those between parents and their children.

I will give you an example:

My parents retired, and became part of a church mission, in Saltillo, Mexico. I had left the church, a few years earlier (when I was at the University) but I was visiting them there - because, after all, they were still my parents. When something strange happened - they decided I should sleep (and have sex) with an older woman, also a church member. This would keep me in the church!

Looking back at this - it probably have worked out. I could have slept with her at night - and then we could have resumed our normal lives during the day - she with her daughter and her mission. I with my parents, and my sister.

My parents left the mission not too long after this - and I could have looked back at this episode, as another part of my strange life. Nobody would have been hurt - but we all had wasted part of our precious lives.